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August 03, 2004
Remind me never to look at the things growing in my throat ever ever again...
So I forgot to tell you the results of the throat cultures we did two weeks ago (and my incident with a culture of candida albacanis, otherwise known as STANK NASTY YEAST INFECTION).
There are beasts in our throats. Evil, horrible, disgusting creatures that are running around and having a barbeque, and I know they are mocking me. Now, this is all "normal flora" as they call it. Stuff that is supposed to be there. But really, it's just gross, and the thought that bacteria are everywhere on me [even if it's for a good reason] just makes my stomach turn. And they are little sluts too. Practically overgrew the agar plate in a matter of days. They don't care who they screw, they just find other bacteria to continue to exponentially multiply their disgustingness.
So then, after I'm already heebing out from the goobers in my throat and all of their little textures and shapes and colors, I am forced to identify a strange and unusual culture of some kind of unknown microorganism.
So what is the first thing I do? SMELL IT.
And what do I get? For all you ladies out there, maybe you should skip this part.
A BIG FAT PUTRID WALL OF YEAST INFECTION SMELL.
What the f-ing hell in this universe was I thinking? Why is my first impulse to smell things when I know, I KNOW that Bridget + Smells = Flashbacks and Nightmares for Years to Come.
I promptly had an anxiety attack and ran out of the room in a cold sweat.
I am now going to be forever terrorized by yeast smell.
Poor Kim even just had a yeasty smelling bagel in the car this morning and I thought I was going to pass out.
And I actually once thought I wanted to work in infectious disease....
Posted by missfitsandstarts at August 3, 2004 09:43 PM


